I’ve come to the end of my rope; I’m mad as hell and I’m
not going to take it anymore! What, you
may wonder, has caused me to get my panties in such a twist? I’m glad you asked (although you may not be
by the time I am finished). I have had
enough of inconsiderate and just plain rude people. And not just any people, the ones
masquerading as friends. You know who
they are: the ones who never commit to a get-together, the ones who don’t
understand that responding to a text shouldn’t take 48 hours, or the ones who
cancel at the last minute without fail.
I could go on here, but I think you get the gist. Let’s tackle these offenders
individually.
The Non-committals
What is so difficult about making plans and keeping
them? You do it all the time, especially
if you happen to have a JOB. Or a
family. Or a pulse. It’s pretty much a given that you are going
to have upcoming events on your calendar at all times. Now there are some events that certainly
require your advance commitment: weddings, graduations, your Prom, and the
Academy Awards ceremonies come to mind.
Even seemingly mundane activities like the annual family picnic (someone
needs to bring the potato salad) may necessitate an affirmative response to
reserve your spot at the kid’s table.
Given these logical points, it still astounds me the
quandary saying “yes” can create for some individuals. You would think you were asking them to
donate a kidney. I can only imagine the
consternation that would ensue in that situation. And if you’re waiting for an engraved
invitation to party with some celebrity you don’t know in the first place, you
need a reality check. Never mind – moving
on to our next suspect.
The Text-phobics
Let’s get this straight once and for all: text messaging
was invented so that people could use their cell phones to communicate quickly
and efficiently without having to let other people know their business. Or use up their minutes. When I was in junior high back in the late 80’s,
I distinctly remember pulling the phone cord as far as it would go and sitting
in the closet in a futile attempt to have some privacy while I was gossiping
with my friends. I would have relished
having the ability to text message back then (or even a cordless phone for that
matter).
So my question here is this: Why did you buy a cell phone package without
the ability to hit the reply button? Or,
if you dislike text messaging so much, you can do what my father did and have
it disabled from your phone. Then you
would save me the aggravation of waiting in texting purgatory to get a
response. I realize that sometimes
people are busy (work, school, having sex, taking a nap) and can’t respond
immediately. However, if you don’t
respond within a reasonable amount of time – I usually allot 24/48 hours give
or take – don’t be surprised at my retort when you finally crawl out from under
your rock and rejoin civilization. I
also have a penchant for imagining the worst-case scenarios: car crash, death, or
dismemberment of your thumbs. So after I
wait so long, my brain goes to the dark side and camps out there indefinitely.
On a side note, it is important to point out that well
known fact that men are only allowed to utter about half of the word volume
that women do on a daily basis. But here’s
a little secret for all the guys out there: texting
is actually a freebie!! It isn’t said out loud, so it doesn’t count
against your spoken word quota for the day. It’s really a secret weapon for you if you
think about it in the right super hero context.
So for the love of god, use it!
The
Bailers
Finally, we have the people who cancel at the last
minute. They are cousins to the
non-commitals I’ve already discussed in detail.
Now these offenders always seem enthusiastic about your plans. They may even initiate reminding you about
your upcoming plans a day or two before they are scheduled to occur. And yet, when the day and hour for those
plans arrives, they have suddenly become sick, had to cover for someone who
didn’t show up at work, or their car won’t start (all of which are code for I found something/someone better to do).
My problem with this is that these people are usually
single and have no clue what I have had to do in order to orchestrate any time
away from my children. When you cancel
on me, I have to then untie all of the knots I tied together to make this
happen. This usually entails, at
minimum, calling or texting the babysitter to cancel on her, and informing my
disappointed kids that they are stuck with me for the evening. I think that is the worst part of all.
In summation, I am not playing games with these
individuals anymore – and you know who you are.
If you can’t commit, just say no.
If you don’t like to respond to text messages, then don’t give me your
number. And if you plan on bailing at
the last minute, you really should have the stones to call me instead of hiding
behind an impersonal text message. I do
my best to keep my calendar from being double booked, respond to people who
address me in a text, and follow thru with my promises. In my opinion, my only valid “get out of jail
free” card is a sick kid who is vomiting.
And that’s the worst way to rain on my parade.
Since I am not listening anymore, I will turn the show
over to a gal who also has a “take no prisoners” attitude about life. I would certainly hate to be on her shit
list.
Theme Song #29: Blow Me (One Last Kiss) by P!nk
http://youtu.be/3jNlIGDRkvQ
Don’t even bother to explain,
Selina
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